Monday 11th March
I have had a few text asking how I am doing, some I don’t respond to, others I honestly respond am not okay, but it’s okay not to be okay. I don’t think people expect me to reply saying am not okay, but I don’t want to lie.
Of course am not okay, I lost my son then my daughter, it’s hard to process. However I still wake up every morning, look out the window and take a deep breath.
I hate that this is my life now, just hurt and loss, and I hate that I have to learn to live with it over and over again. However I still wouldn’t change it.
I have a few selfies with my friends children and babies and I look at them and honestly wonder if I will ever get a selfie with my own living breathing baby. I keep telling myself I will. Well what else can I say. It’s just another chapter in our book it’s not the end yet, the ending has to be spectacular.