What a year 2022 has been

What a year 2022 has been for our journey. In January we were so excited to find out we were expecting again, specially after a ruptured ectopic in 2021, was so happy i wasn’t broken … alas on Robyns 3rd birthday we had a miscarriage. Never mind try again, and then 6 weeks later i find out am pregnant again, its feels to good to be true, this time on James birthday, i start to miscarry again. Bad luck ouch, my consultant was amazing as usual, but because of my ectopic I wasn’t aloud to start my blood thinner, so she asked another consultant who specialises in recurrent losses to review my notes.. sorted new plan, scan 5/6 weeks then start on blood thinner and progesterone.. June came and .. much to my surprise again we had another big fat positive, could this be 3rd time lucky , scan 6 weeks all good stared on meds, scan at 8 weeks, has to go myself as Jame was away off shore, and as soon as i see the scan, i think thats not good, baby only measuring 6 weeks 2 day, but there is a heart beat, right on our anniversary this time, ffs!!! So we have to wait another week before any other intervention.. one week later and we are there again this time a general scanning clinic in Rubislaw because my consultant is on holiday. As soon as they start to scan i can see baby hasn’t grown and there isn’t a heart beat! I just wanted it over, its now July and Findley birthday is fast approaching.. thank goodness that the consultant was coving the scan clinic knew me and agreed to undertake a D&C that day. All is completed and home I trotted.

August passed and my cycle seemed a little funny, we decided to try again, but then i stopped ovulating.. wtf… i mean seriously i give up, am broken, so September passes and October and I decide its time to do something about this.. so I call my GP who agreed to do bloods to check progesterone levels, and these confirmed no ovulation.. feck.. i was so upset, i just felt so broken and alone. I had no one to reach out to, 9 pregnancies, 1 living child my heart breaks.. you think we have survived so much we deserve a break

I decided to reach out to my consultant as my GP was really unhelpful and just told me i needed to lose weight.. okay yeah that the problem.. blame the fat girl.. anyway my consultant as always amazing, refered me back to the recurrent loss specialist and within a week, I am sitting back in rubislaw waiting to be seen.

Its so weird because although there was no magic solution she gave us a plan, and I left feeling like ok cool the jets, lets see what happens the in the new year we will see her again, if am still not pregnant she will refer us to fertility specialist.. in the mean time, i need to drop some weight and stop “trying”. I felt like someone had listened to me and i think maybe thats all we needed. She also said she was going to ask a specialist from Tommys to review my notes, she made no promises but he may have some suggestions.

Honestly what we have survived is so shit but we spark interest in people and when people are interested they get involved, so I felt chilled and off went

About two weeks later we all test positive for covid, #fuckyou2022.. so we are ill to be fair it was the first time we had, had it so shouldn’t complain.. then wtf but am pregnant again, so not broke … and my consultant had agreed for my to start my blood thinners at 4 weeks…

So off I trundled with my injections, and life, two weeks later i though ok time to tell my consultant, so email sent.. feels real, feels like am going to start miscarrying.. next day my phone rings, its the recurrent miscarriage consultant and Tommy shared a plan.

They reviewed all my notes and even pulled my placenta sample, all normal, bur his advice is to treat me as if i have CHI.. what CHI… its Chronic Histiocytic Intervillositis, I know am like wtf… leaflet ⬇️

https://www.tommys.org/sites/default/files/legacy/CHI_Patient_Leaflet.pdf

This treatment is extremely hard core and its completely experimental.. but wtf do i have to lose .. nothing.. so here we go…

Steroids, aspirin, bloods thinner and hydroxychloroquine.. lets see how this works out.. i was so annoyed that I didn’t speak to my consultant earlier as i should have started this treatment straight away .. but hey i feel like at least if this pregnancy ends in miscarriage too, we have a plan for round 6 🫣

Deep breath here we go….